guaduation

someone asked me this week who i felt about my daughter guaduating high school….well firstly i have to say it makes me cry, and the tears are for some many things…..happiness, i am proud, my daughter worked hard all her life to get to where see is going and it has not been easy for this child…..when my daughter was 5 she was stricken with a disease called Henoch-Schonlein Purpura (HSP), AND STPENT 9 MONTHS In and out of stoneybrook hospital……she bowl reconstruction surgry, wore a bag for 5 months, to cut it short it was 9 months worth of nughtmare,.  my daughter had just started kindergarten……she was so brave, and i think this child taught me to be strong, and to really know what prayer is and to know that when you ask for god’s will, it might not be to your liking, and there is nothing you can do about it but prayer some more.

i remember her in her hospital bed asking me to make math problems for her to solve, this child came into this world an old sole. and she did math problems and she read to me. and if a 5 year old could be a hero, she sure was mine.  my daughter is and always has been an above average student, she won awards all through her school years, worked like a dog, i never once in her life had to tell her to do her homework…….

i remember the night she was born and the doctor held her up to me like kunta kinta, and i know i was blessed, see that picture in my mind’s eye everyday…….

before she reached junior high school she was in 6 different schools, we moved alot in those days…..and i remember one of teachers telling me that they would never have known because she was so well adjusted.

i remember when i was planning a trip to disney , and she was soooooooooo upset that she was going to miss school……she hates to miss school……..in high school she did everything, and except for the prevalant atitude of most teenagers she has not given me a day of trouble, she has worked for the past 2 years, this year’s prom she paid for everything herself, and was accepted into every collage she applied too…..

so how do i feel, i happy, i am sad, i am truly amazed that i, me have such a wonderful child, but then again i raised my daughters to be independent thinkers and to take no shit from anyone. and to remember that they are women and to be strong and that there is nothing you can’t do………..

and in some ways i so afraid for this child, because as smart as she is, she can’t boil water……and  hope that going away will give her those other life skills, the kind they don’t teach in school, the things that you can only learn at the university of hardknocks.

another thing that i have always told my children is that i am home, that matter where i am, or how i am, i am there home and they can always come home to me and no matter where i am they have a home with me…..

it so scary how fast they grow, i have heard people say that to me all their lives, but man until it happens to you, you have no idea, a snap of finger and there more grown up then you are.

i miss her already, and i really don’t want her to go and i wish she choose to go to school and live at home, but it was her choice, .

thank you god for blessing me with 2 beautiful children, and when i think of what i would have done differently in my life, it always comes back to nothing, absolutely nothing, because if my life were different, i wouldn’t have the 2 beautiful children that i have.

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